Shadow Babysits Tails
by Tais the chosen one
Summary: Sonic now finally getting a date with Amy, Sonic dumps Tails on Shadows doorstep, Shadow will learn why its not a good idea to deprive a kitsune of his ice cream Continued!
1. The Nightmare Begins

SHADOW BABYSITS TAILS!

Hi made this a while ago but decided to post it up here. Anyway please be nice where reviewing thanks!

Shadow lay on the sofa watching the news"Today should be a sunny day without a cloud in the skyshadow looked out the window and watched it pour with rain as he saw this he shot the T.V. causing the power to go off"dumbass weather man"shadow groweled suddenly the was a knock on the door and as shadow opened it a blue hedgehog with a 2 tailed fox holding his hand"Sonic what do you wnat I'm in the middle of something vey important"groweled shadow"you were shooting the T.V. again weren't you?"replied sonic"...shut up"replied shadow  
"whatever listen I need you to baby sit tails amy and I have to,take care of something "replied sonic while blushing shadow raised an eyebrow and asked"what happened to tails old nanny?" sonic hesitated before saying£tails put her in the hospital ENJOY"and with that sonic was gone and tails slowly turned his head towards shadow"what?"asked a half scared and half angry hedgehog "I want Icecream"replied tails"I don't have any"replied shadow"I WANT ICCCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE CRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM"tails screamed so loud the window broke and tails took out a shotgun and chased shadow around the house"(curse word) YOU SONIC"screamed shadow as he dodged the bullets

shadow and vector started to praise knux and kept saying our sdavior wich just creeped knuckles out "ehhhhh okaaaay what is going on?"asked a confused knuckles"Tails is after us he no child he has a shotgun!"what?tails does NOT have a shotgun!"shouted knuckles  
"he does my master he does"praised vector"you guys have issues look!"knuck pointed to a sleeping tails on the couch and vector and shadow just stared with an expresion like this on their face"now I'm leaving THAT'S THE LAST TIME I TRY TO TALK TO SHADOW FIRST I GET RUN OVER AND KNOW THIS!"screamed knux as he slammed the door and tails instantly opened his eyes and pulled out a shot gun"who wants to die?"  
thanx I'm gonna add a lot of characters!  
"tails if we give you ice cream will you stop this?"asked a desprite shadow  
AT THE SUPERMARKET  
"yay theres one tub of ice cream"tails is about to grab it but suddenly big appears and grabs it"look froggy ice cream"explained the fat stupid cat(I HATE BIG)"THAT...IS...MY...ICE CEAM DIE"tails takes out machine gun and shoots at big and starts to destroy all things around him until big is just a pile of corpse"hahahaha oj yeah how much is this?"asked tails to the lady at the pay in  
"5.50"explained the lady  
"5.50! "shouted tails and with that tails throws the tub on bigs corpse and says "you can have it back big"and tails walked of with a petrified shadow and vector crawling after him  
"do you think he'llhurt us"asked a shaking shadow who looked so pethetic that it's impossible to describe  
"As long as we shut up and-hey wheres tails..OH GOD"screamed vector as he saw tails rob a bank and then a candy store eating over a thousand sweets at once and the two wimps-I mean heoes just started at tails as he went from shop to shop  
stealing anything he saw and shadow and vector just stared before vector asked  
"wanna get a soda?"  
"sure why not"rplied shadow as they left Tails to his "fun".  
4 HOURS LATER  
shadow and vector exit the cinema  
"I can't believe you made me wath 2 and a half hours of STAR WARS III!screamed shadow  
"hey I happen to like Star Wars anddidn't you want to now how it ends?"asked vector  
"NO!"screamed shadow but he was stopped from saying any more as he saw that the whole city was totally destroyed and most of the buildings were on firand tails was standing in the middle holding the shotgun behind his back  
"I didn't do it!""said tails  
"were the hell did you get that shotgun from"asked shadow  
"Creams mum gave it to me as a birthday present "replied tails  
"why the hell did Vanilla give you a shotgun"asked shadow  
"...dunno"replied tails and vector and shadow did an anime fall  
"fine come one lets just go home"replied Vector  
AT SHADOWS PLACE  
"shadow I wanna watch Sonic SATAM"said tails  
"no repied shadow but instantly put it in the DVD machine when tails put a hand on his shotgun.  
20 MINUTES LATER IN THE END WITH SONIC SAYS  
"hey kids theres nothing more cool thatn being huged by someone you like but if someone trys to touch in a way or lace that makes you feel uncomfortable thats no good!It's your body no one has the right to touch it if you don't want them to"said sonic  
"...THIS VIDEO IS SERIOUSLY DISTURBED!"said shadow as the video ended and  
Tails got up  
"I want sonic"said tails and shadow shook his head  
"no"replied shadow  
"I WANT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC!"SCREAMED Tails but then he stopped and looked at shadow he asked  
"what"  
"hey shadow come here "replied tails in an evil tone as tails picked up a pot of blue paint  
& quot;NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"Screamed shadow as he ran from the hyperactive fox  
"...ah screw it"replied vector as he took a beer out of the fridge and watched shadow being chased


	2. Ice Cream and a Drunk Crocidile

HOUR LATER  
shadow is now covered in blue paint and can't seem to scrub it off  
"Dam you Homebase dam you non removable paint"screamed shadow as he tried to get the paint of but to no aval  
"Shadow it's not gonna come of"replied Vector  
"IT MUST I MUST HAVE MY BEAUTIFULLY SEXY DARK FUR BACK"scremed shadow who was now trying to cover it with black paint wich made it worse  
"ummmmmm okay I'm gonna go check on tails "repied a nervous v ctor as he made his way to the bedroom where tails was busy...well being tails  
"weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I can fly"screamed tails(PS I DO NOT HATE TAILS HE'S JUST HYPER!)as he banged his head on the wall as he flew around  
"ummm tails what are you doing "asked a shocked vector but tails said nothing and just stared at vector and this spooked vector out  
"ummmmmm okay hey you wanna go to the fair"asked vector  
"NO"screamed shadow  
"YES"screaned tails!  
"I'm not getting paid enough for this"shouted shadow and sonic randomly appeared by the window and said  
"your not being payed anything"and he ran off  
"(curse word) YOU HEDGEHOG!"screamed shadow

AT THE FAIR  
"OHH I WANT TO TRY THAT OHHHHH AND THAT"shouted tails  
"I wanna try this"said shadow who was pointing at a bench  
"NO WERE GOING ON THIS"shouted tails as he pointed to a massive rollorcoaster  
"bbbbut I'm affarid of heeeeights" stammered shadow but he was already in the carrage and was now stapped in and shadow was now being blasted through the ride that was just too much for shadow but tails on the other hand looked bored so the condutor put the ride on maximum speed and I'm sorry to say that this pushed shadow to his limmit and was know trying to jump off the ride  
10 minutes later  
"LAND"screamed shadow as he fell to the floor after the ride and was now kissing the dirt  
"I wanna try a shooting game"screamed tails and he dragged shadow across the pitch while vector was now at the bar drinking a beer  
"I'm gonna miss you shadow"snickered vector  
"you evil crocidile you have no honour"scremed shadow  
"no...but at least I'm not being dragged around a fair with a 8 year old with a gun"snickered vector  
AT THE SHOOTING GAME  
"well hello mister would you like a turn"asked the gamesmen  
"yes please"said tails as he took out the shoutgun and loaded it  
" ummm ooookkkkkay hhhhhherrrree yyyou ggggo"replied the petrified man as he handed tails his change  
Tails easily took out all the targets and won a teddy bear tails wa\s not so pleased  
"thats what I win a god (curse word) teddy bear "screaned tails as he loaded his gun and chased the games men  
10 MINUTES LATER  
tails was now holding a machine gun instead of his teddy bear  
"do you really think it was neccessary to tie him upside down and try to feed him to a shark tails"asked shadow  
"hey not my fault he can't take a joke"replied tails  
okay  
A drunken vector walking around the fair after having 50 BEERS! he slowly made his way towards tails and started to kiss tails and said  
hello goregous come back to my place"replied a drunken vector  
& quot;AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"SCREAMED TAILS AND HE STARTED TO BEAT VECTOR WITH THE END OF HIS GUN  
AT SHADOWS HOUSE 5 HOURS LATER  
"oooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh "moaned a hung over vector as he made his way to the mirror and what he saw nearly made him scream  
vector was wearing high heels with lipstic on a blonde wig a pink dress and earings  
"I have lost all my prde"sobbed vector  
"enjoing your new look"asked shadow

after shadow failed commiting sucide for the 8 time  
"7th"  
SHUT UP!...anyway shadow decided to call rouge  
"hello"  
"HELLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPP MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"screamed shadow  
"...shadow have you being eating dog food agin"asked rouge  
an hour later rouge came in  
"rouge thank god you came ta-...rouge why are you only wearing a brar andpants?  
"hey it sounded urgent and I had no time to change"replied rouge but shadow was not listening as he stared at rouges...ummm...melonscough cough  
"yes there real so stp staring!"shouted rouge  
"I wasn't staring!"shouted shadow as he tried to wip away the drool  
after shadow showed rouge where tails was they could see he had blindfolded vector and was kicking him  
"tails stop"said rouge  
"okay"said tails  
" WTF"was shadows first impression  
"a lady can handle a child"said rouge  
" ...fine you take care of him"said shadow as he started to run out the door but vector grabbed his leg after he had taking the blindfold off  
"NO! IF DIE YOU DIE WITH ME"screamed vector   
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"screamed shadow  
Things had been running smoothlyducks from flying vase  
I don't get paid enough for this...anyway rouge had oly been gone for 5 minutes as she had popped to the bathroom and already shadows house had lost it's roof so he decided to call espio  
"espio listen come over here right now I need your (curse word) help and if you don't come right now I stick a grenade up your ass and-wait whos this...oh hi espios mum "  
Espio arrived and was now trying to calm down tails by meditating but after 5 minutes tails had decided it was more fun to pull espios tounge  
"ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh the paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"screamed espio

okay wheres espio"asked shadow to nobody in particular but as he said this he saw espio in a straight jacket being dragged to a mad house "HAHAHAHAHA HES SATANS SON HAHAHAHA I AM THE LIQUARD KING"screamed espio he made his way to the bedroom and he saw that vector had womens clothes on and singing britiny spears 

Vector:I can't get u otta my head boy your love is all I think about  
" ...I don't wanna know"replied shadow as he knocked on the door of the bathroom  
"rouge?"asked shadow as he opened the door to see the window open and nobody inside  
"(curse word) YOU ROUGE!"screamed shadow  
"I WANT ICE CREAM"screamed tail who now had a number so big my computer can't put it onof ice cream tubs  
"oh man how am I gonna clean this?"asked shadow as he saw ails devour the icecream leaving alot of mess behind

shadow was so desperate now tails had put espio in a mad house rouge to run away and vector to start wearing women clothes shadow did not want to be another victim of tails so he decided to call knuckles but befor he could tails came to him asking for fun  
"go do something usefu for Sega fans!"snapped shadow  
5 minutes later tails came back in with a dead body of Big the cat(soory to all Big supporters)  
"WHAT DID YOU DO"screamed shadow  
"You said to do something useful for Sega fans"replied tails  
"...good point"replied shadow

Tails was playing basket ball with bigs corpse and shadow was calling knuckles  
"hello?"  
"helpmeIhaveacrazyfoxwhohasamachinegunandheputespioiamadhousehelpme!  
"...ummm shadow have u been eatiting horse crap again"started knuckles  
"yes but no wait umm..THATS NOT THE PONIT! HELP ME I'M RUNNING OUT OF TIME!"screaed shadow  
"okay okay hey ummmm shadow"asked knuckles  
"what does the crap tgaste lik-"started knuckles but was cut off as shadow put down the phone  
Shadow sighed as he turned around he saw vector winking at him  
"hey sexy where u headed"purred vector  
" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"screamed shadow like a little girl  
10 minutes later knuckles appeared by the door he saw tails playing basketball with a dead cat corpse and an odly dressed vector chasing shadow  
" ...(curse word) I should lay off the Big Macs"stammered knuckles as he closed the door the moment he did this all eyes turned to him  
"ummmmm hi?"replied knuckles  
"THERE IS A GOD"screamed shadow as he bowed to knuckles  
"okay hey t-TAILS WHAT THE HELL ARE U DOING"screamed knuckles as he saw tails trying to disect froggy but knuckles grabbed him in the nick of time  
this did not go down well with tails  
10 minutes later knuckles is tied to a train track and a train comin at 70 miles an hour towards him


	3. What Happens when you annoy me

Knuck was screaming his ass of as the tain came closer  
"I BEG U PLEASE TAILS LEY ME LIVE"screamed knux  
"okay okay"sighed tails  
"hmmm okay man not is tough"said tails  
"hurry!"screamed knux  
"hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"thought tails  
"ahhhhhhhhhhhh"screamede knux  
"ahh here we go"sid tails as he undid the knot just as the train crashed into knux and he was sent flying  
"I HATE U ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL"screamed knux

Tails:bye bye knux

Knux:BURN IN HHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL dissapers

Tails:well hes rude

Vector;Hey sexy Espio where are u?

Espio :get away pervert!

Vector:but your so hot

Espio :ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!  
WHY DID I GET INVOLVED IN THIS!

Me :because the public wanted it

Espio :DAM THE PUBLIC DAM THIS SITE

Tails:ummm I wouldnt bad mouth the site Vector

Espio :What what are the retards gonna do

A giant bould suddenly randomly falls on espio

Espio :point taken


	4. Shadow You Pervert!

Woah Have not updated in ages, have no fear readers more Shadow torment to come.

Shadow: How can anyone like this story?

Me: because they like ego headed people like you get taken down a peg or two

Shadow: YOU CAN NEVER DEMORILZE ME I AM THE ULTIMATE LIFE FORM!

Tails: that's getting really old, if you're the ultimate life form how come you can't fly

Shadow: well-

Sonic: or breath under water

Shadow: but-

Knuckles: or defeat sonic?

Shadow: but-

Rouge: or even get a girlfriend

Shadow:…..whimper

Tails is in his room singing his favourite song

"When you wish upon a star…shows how gay you really are.."

Umm...right anyway moving on Shadow and Vector and Espio were busy in the bedroom (Not Like that you dirty pervert!)

"What should we do about him? I mean we have tried everything!" yelled Vector

"Well there's one person we could try" said Shadow

"Who's that" asked Espio

Shadow pointed to a picture of Tikal on his wall in an odd pose.

"Hey that's a great idea Shado- wait why do you have a picture of Tikal on your wall?" asked Vector

"…." Was Shadows reply

LATER

Tikal slowly walked in the house and looked around. Shadow, Vector and Espio walked out.

"Hi Tikal" said Espio

"Hi Tikal" said Vector

"…."

"Shadow…why are you drooling?" asked Vector at a Shadow who was staring at Tikal

"……."

"SHADOW!" yelled Vector

"WHAT! Oh hey Tikal...nice.. package" he said

Tikal slapped him

"I think he meant the package under your arm" pointed out Espio

"Oh oops sorry Shadow no hard feelings"

"……"

"SHADOW STOP STARING AT HER!" yelled Vector

"I wasn't staring…I was admiring the view"

Shadow was slapped again

"Yeah he deserved that one" said Espio

"So where's Tails" asked Tikal

Espio pointed too the last room in the hall

"May God Be with you" saluted Vector

Tikal gave him an odd look and walked towards the room.

A few minutes past and all was quite until Tikal was sent crashing through the door and into shadow causing Shadow too fall on top of her.

" TAKE THAT BUSH SUPPORTER!" yelled Tails and he stormed into another room.

"Ow…thanks shadow you can get off now"

"….."

"Shadow get off"

"….."

"Shadow I'm warning you off!"

"….."

"DO YOU WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN! IF YOU DO I SUGGETS YOU GET OFF ME RIGHT NOW!" she yelled

"Touche" said Shadow and he got off

"So how did it go with Tails?" asked Espio who was leaning against a wall both eyes closed.

"I asked him if he wanted to go to McDonalds and he stared screaming that I wanted to poison him and that I was working for the government to make more American kids Obese and then he set my hair on fire stuck a spear in my arm and tied me up and threw me out the window and pulled me back up like a yo-yo" she said

"But other than that it went okay" said Espio

"I hate you" said Tikal

"I know" he replied.

TO BE CONTINUED!

Me: tut tut Shadow

Shadow: you're the one who wrote the script

Tails: a likely story Shadow

Sonic: were very disappointed in you

Shadow mumbles something along the lines of Duck off

Me: anyway R&R or we will set Shadow the pervert on your sisters!

Shadow: what if they don't have a sisters

Me: Brothers instead then

Shadow: I'M NOT GAY!

Sonic: sure that's what they all say


	5. Dissceting

Sorry for not posting for ages but I have been very busy with school.

Shadow: Noooo and I thought I was free!

Tails: haha get real shadow

Shadow: why me?

Sonic: because you blew up prison island

Shadow: yeah but-

Tails: got sonic thrown in jail

Shadow: that wasn't-

Knuckles: stole the chaos emeralds

Shadow: we weren't-

Sonic: helped doctor eggman blow up half the moon

Shadow: It wasn't-

Tails: nearly killed sonic

Shadow: well yeah...but-

Sonic: and you look like a Goth

Shadow….I hate you all…

Shadow and Espio were looking at the clock, they had an hour and a half left before they were free.

Espio: wait I wasn't ment too take care of him…why am I here?

Narrator: for humour

Espio: but technically I can leave-

Narrator: silence!

Espio hides in a corner.

Anyway, Tails was busy playing with his train set, Shaow takes a peek in and sees that Tails had got bored with just the train and made it catch fire and had strapped a small rat on the track all tied up and ready too be "dissected". Not wanting too see the result of this shadow closed the door and lay down on the couch.

Espio had a banadage on his head, a cast on his leg and his horn was broken. Shadow was just a sbad, half his fur on one of his hands had been burnt away and he had a black eye and dried blood from his nose on his face. The phone started ringing, shadow and espio jumped at it, both fighting for it, shadow won, by pulling espios already swalloen tongue.He grabbed the phone.

Shadow: HelpuswerestuckinahousewithacrazyfoxwithamachinegunandIthinkhejustsetfiretoohistrainsetandisusingittookillarat!FORTHELOVEOFGODHELPUS!

The phone hung up.

Shadow places it back and looks at Espio.

Shadow: Do you think I came on a bit too strong?

Espio: next time I answer the phone

There is a loud bang coming from Tails room, they slowly walk in seeing Tails using a hammer against his wall.

Espio: Tails…..what are you doing?

Tails: Sonic said when ever you have a fight, you need too build a bridge and get over it, so I'm making a bridge just in case I ever have a fight.

Espio: ……

Shadow: where is Vector how long does it take too take a piss?

Narator: he ran off

Shadow: what!

Narator: Don't worry we sent him somewhere which will teach him a lesson

Airport

Vector: ahhh finally got away too Hawaii just sunny beaches and hot chicks and…

He walks off the plane and its raining with dark clouds and the airport has big letters in the entrance Welcome Too Scotland

Vector: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(SideNote: I have no problem with Scottish people I just don't like British weather.)

Me: so how did we like that?

Everyone except shadow: great!

Espio: some ultimate life form you are

Shadow: you can't exactly talk, you're a bloody ninja

Espio: true but I can do something you can't

Shadow: what's that?

Espio sticks a ninja sun where the sun don't shine

Shadow: oh…shhiiiittt


	6. Authors Note: Its Over

The End

I just got a recent review for this story, this reviewer, though saying it was not a flame deliberately tried too make me feel miserable about myself and even had so much free time as too count my spelling mistakes, he says my stories give a bad reputation, too the site and hurt readers eyes. So very well if this is true then I will stop writing and I apologies for hurting your eyes.

If any of you are curious here is his review

This story was recommended by one of your reviewers. I can see why.

Trash like this hurts. It hurts a reader's eyes. It hurts a reader's brain. It hurts the community. It destroys the site's image.

I dare to ask a question: how many minutes have you "slaved" over the "hot" computer screen clanking this monstrosity out? Make the numbers look big, please. I could use a laughable lie on this matter.

Now then, that is all you deserve. However, since I have to show sense in my words as well as prove righteousness, an analysis follows.

My friend, I have analyzed 430 words in your story. There were approximately 290 mistakes in those words (no exclusions, starting from the beginning). If you have continued with that tendency (have not wasted time to analyze the remaining four hundred) you have over five hundred errors in your story. (Pardon my capitals) FIVE HUNDRED ERRORS.

I am sorry, but I believe this gives me the right to state that you have little or no writing talent. My pen name had been on this site for over two years and I have never seen a story this bad. I am going to save this on the hard drive for future reference.

You want the errors pointed out for proof? Will do. The mistakes are examined in parentheses.

"Hi (comma) made this a while ago (comma) but decided to post it up here. Anyway (comma) please (comma) be nice (comma) where (bad word choice) reviewing (comma) thanks" Seven mistakes in an author's note. Bravo!

"Shadow lay (lied) on the (article "the") sofa watching the news(space, paragraph)"Today should(word choice) be a sunny day without a cloud in the sky(quotation mark, paragraph, punctuation mark, space)shadow(capital) looked out the window and watched it(what or who?) pour with rain(comma) as he saw(tense) this(comma) he shot the T.V.(comma) causing(bad word choice) the power to go off(period, space, paragraph)"dumbass(capital) weather man(space, paragraph, punctuation mark)"shadow(capital) groweled(typo) (paragraph)suddenly(comma) the(typo) was a knock on the door(comma) and as(bad word choice) shadow(capital) opened it(comma) a blue hedgehog with a 2 tailed(dash) fox holding his hand(verb missing, period, paragraph, space)"Sonic(comma) what do you wnat(typo, period) I'm in the middle of something vey(typo"

Let us add the regular stuff: lack of detail, characters are out of character greatly; plot holes, lack of motivation, randomness, stupidity.

This is not a flame. This is constructive criticism and a reminder: if you are cruel to your readers' eyes, your readers will not be nice to you.

Have a nice, abuse-free day.

P.S. Reported.


	7. Authors Notes: I am back!

Authors Note: Yes I am back! I have decided that the majority like this story, and my crazy off the wall mind and for that I thank you and so, stuff what the flamers say, the show must go on!

Shadow: NO I THOUGHT I WAS FREE! FREE!

Me: well your not so get ready for a lot more Shadow bashing, psycho Tails, machine guns and stupid slap dash humour.

Shadow: how can people like this crap!?

Tails: you just have to look at what's on TV these days, I mean like that show 'How Clean Is Your House??' Why the hell would you want two women to come to your house, and to broadcast how disgusting your house is???

Sonic: It's the 21st century; people will do anything for thirty minutes of fame.

Me: right anyway, next chapter will be up soon, but before I go and get some sleep I would like to ask you whether you would like to see either.

A. A lot of shadow bashing involving a gorilla suit, a cage and a male gorilla.

B. Some Amy or Knuckles bashing

C. Tails watches Family Guy too much and begins to imitate Stewie Griffin

D. Something even more random than the above

Review and Vote Now!


	8. Tails is going to kill you

Chapter 7: Tails is going to kill you…

Side Note: the people I make fun of in this story is not insulting them, its just me going over the top

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Inside Shadows house, Tails was busy being quiet for once and watching Family Guy. Shadow was sitting on the couch when the phone rang, and he slowly picked it up.

"Hello??"

"Yeah this is Wingless Rain, I saw your show on the TV, it sucks! It's amazing how you managed to write a show without even a faint trace of description"

Shadow paused before answering slowly.

"Okay well thanks for calling, we will try and work on that…"

Shadow hangs up and then the phone rings again, so he picks it up.

"Hello??"

"Me again, You're the true master of all things scripted and horrible!"

"Eh okay, well like I said we will try and work on it, but this is just for laughs, so try and keep your temper in check okay?" Shadow replied before hanging up, but yet again the phone rings.

"What?" sighed Shadow

"Hey by the way, it's not possible to beat this in awfulness.  
It's so shitty and terrible that it should not be, yet here it is, before my eyes - all junk, all shit, all stupid, all dumb.

If a good laugh prolongs your life, then I've just attained immortality, and another thing…"

Shadow at this point was getting bored and put the phone on the table and left the flamer to talk to thin air as he went to get a beer.

A few hours later Shadow came back and found that the flamer was still talking, picking up the phone Shadow yelled into it.

"Okay we get the message, you hate it, you said it once, go do something better with your life, and leave me the hell alone!" and with that Shadow slammed the phone down and walked off. Vector and Espio looked at each other.

"That was not particularly funny…" commented Vector

"Hey, the writer wanted to get it off his chest, better not argue with him unless you want to be a transsexual again" replied Espio

(By the way those comments from Wingless River were pretty much quotes I edited the first one)

Shadow walked back into the living room and noticed that Tails was gone.

"That's weird, I could have sworn he was here a seco-" started Shadow but he was silenced when Tails came in with an evil look on his face and a strange yellow t-shirt with a red overtop.

"Hey Tails were have you been??" asked Shadow

Tails in response held out a box of chocolates and said with a very evil British accent.

"You know mother life is like a box of chocolates…"

Shadow gave him a blank look, and replied slowly

"Tails why are you calling me mother??"

But Tails evil smile grew wider and he chose to ignore Shadow and continue his speech.

"You never know what your going to get…your life however is life a box of active grenades!!!!!" he yelled the last part loudly and opened the box to reveal a box of grenades, Shadow decided to deal with the situation life a mature and calm adult.

"OH MY GOD I'M GONNA DIE, HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET GRENADES!!??!?! OH MY GOD I'M GONNA DIE, AND I JUST WET MY PANTS!!!!!"

Ehhhh right anyway moving on, Tails eyes narrowed and his voice grew colder by the second.

"Oh so you cannot hear me…now release my mind control device, or be destroyed"

"Tails what the hell in gods named are you talking about!??!!" screamed Shadow

"You have three seconds…" continued Tails

"What the hell is a mind control device anyway!!??!?!?"

"Three…"

"Tails your losing it!!! Please for the love of god stop the joke!!!!"

"Two…"

"Why me!!!?!??! How did the ultimate life form get stuck with a psycho kid fox!?"

"One…."

Shadow shut his eyes, but nothing happened, slowly he opened his eyes and saw that the grenades had not gone off.

"Phew good one Tails, you know for a second I thought you were actually seriou-"

Suddenly the whole room exploded and smoke filled the whole area, slowly it faded and Shadows fur was a complete mess and he was completely back from the soot. Tails somehow was unaffected by the explosion and was now standing with an empty box, once filled with grenades. Shadow fell to the floor, waving a white flag above his head. Tails held his hands up in the air and screamed.

"Victory is mine!!!"

Me: sorry about that chapter I know it was not that good

Shadow: does that mean the story is cancelled!??!?!!

Me: It's not that bad shadow

Shadow: dam it

Me: you know the drill gang, R&R.


End file.
